Sent from my iPhone
Friday, December 31, 2010
I had the bright idea to record one of the massive ones and then send it to all of my friends. Then JD and Bird both sent me one back.
This means war.
If you ever get bored, record a fart, and send it out. It will make you feel good about yourself.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
I know people say that I'm crazy and weird... but you've gotta meet my crazy family to see that I am not the only one.
2 things that always happen at Christmas Eve with the Nelson clan: 12 Days of Christmas, and crazy random games.
My mom made everyone play this one game where you had a Kleenex box attached to your waste, and you were supposed to shake everything out of it. This is how it went...
Then, it was gift giving time. And my mother is notorious for giving the craziest presents to everyone.
She walked her tiny self into the living room with two giant bags, sat them down, and started handing them out. Some of the gifts included:
And thanks to Bird for my beautiful gift...
First off, I hate shopping. With a passion. Why did I want to go? Because I got money for Christmas and I wanted to THAT'S WHY!
So me and little Lin ventured west to Ridgmar mall.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Saturday, December 11, 2010
First off let me say, that question was interpreted wrong. Or maybe read wrong. I really dont remember for sure, but this is what Kevin and I heard. The real question was "What has teeth, but can't bite?". The answer is "A Comb".
Kevin's PG answer was:
"It's gotta be a butthole. Cause it can bite a terd in half". (<-----Insert hysterical laughter here)
Road Rules is pretty much gone now, and Real World is just boring. I could predict exactly what would happen on a season of The Real World. For example:
- There will be white people, one black, maybe a hispanic, a gay person, a person from the country that says racist things, a funny guy, and a drug addict/alcoholic/bullimic - pretty much, somebody with a problem.
- They will get drunk together on the first night. One of the roommates will get too drunk and throw up. Then they will be ashamed for acting so crazy.
- Somebody will fight.
- Somebody will complain about the cleanliness of the house.
- More people will fight
- People will make up, tell the confessional camera what they have learned about their self, hug everybody, cry and go home.
- Rachel will sing some sappy solo about love.
- Brittney will be dumb.
- Mr. Shue will be sad about Emma.
- Sue will make fun of everybody and try to ruin the Glee Club.
- Kurt will sulk about something.
- Artie will be in a wheelchair.
If you didnt see it this week, then you really missed out. To make a short story shorter, CT came back to battle a person from the Red and Blue team to see who stays, and who goes. Watch the clip and see how it ended. :)
These past few days, I feel like I have lost touch with my people. I blame Facebook. With this number game, picture games, Farmville and all the rest of that junk. I wish we could go back to the olden days when Facebook didnt have to try to be cool (Myspace). It was just cool.
So I propose that we ban all of these silly games and get back to normal. Who's with me?
By the way, #740 - I hope you eat something you're allergic to, and then your face swells up like Will Smith's did in Hitch. And then I hope you take some medicine and sleep for 16 hours, and miss an important engagement.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
If you are reading this, then I am alive and well. I am also completely annoyed with all of these facebook questions and change your picture to a cartoon so we can ALL be pedophiles together.
So I wanted to try something to see how many people will follow. :)
I want EVERYBODY that will, to change their profile picture to their favorite junk food, then have their status read:
"Change your profile picture to a picture of junk food today, for the National Fight Obesity Campaign. Copy and paste this into your status, to help the cause".
Let's see how many bozo's catch on.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Tammy - Miss my other mama! Little Tanner's quarter century birthday is coming up. Maybe we should do something really special this year.... Tell Derrrrrrnnnn I said what's up. :)
Brandi - What can I say about you that I havent said about somebody else important.
Im only kidding. Im glad I have some sisters like you and Brit. Well... more you, cuz Brittany is kinda weird and she smells funny sometimes.
Joseph Michael Davis Solis a.k.a. Joe Bob - What up lil cuz! Im ready to kick it with you and all the fam again at Christmas. Me and Reggie have some plans... All im gonna tell you though is GET READY!
Kinsey - Hello. What can I say about you that I havent already said about your sister. You're the little sister I've never really wanted, but I love ya anyways. So proud of you for ACU. Wait... you're still goin there right? BTW, Im ready to see you run some track! DO WORK.
La'Tricia - Pardon me for that typo, I meant to say COOOOKIE!!!!!!! Miss you and Kok. We need to make a trip soon. How about all of the cousins that are of age, go to Vegas for a weekend????
Sir-Spanks-A-Lot - Hello to my old improv friend. Glad to see you're doing well. One of these days, you're gonna be famous. I know it. If you need a personal assistant, let me know. Im sure im good at making coffee, or fetching other things for you. It could be like the life of a modern day indentured servant.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Since this NFL season started there has been a lot of hubub (old folks word) about concussions and helmet to helmet hits. I've been trying to decide where I stand on it, because I, like many of the players in the NFL, have experienced multiple concussions (You are probably saying to yourself "Wow that explains a lot". )
If I ever find my BIG concussion video, Ill put it on here. You will laugh.
Anywho, I really think the referees need to do a better job. I think it is completely retarded that somebody can land an illegal hit and the next day you find out you get fined $40,000 for it.
Stop trying to kill each other every play. Leave that to the guys who play Semi-Pro football that think they are still awesome.
Friday, December 3, 2010
I dont know how this guy does it. I can barely eat mango habanero wings from Buffalo Wild Wings (Shout out to my boy Q) without breaking a sweat.
In the words of Bird "I'd be s****** fire for weeks".
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Then I think.
And think some more.
Me - "That's cool. I know I played on Facebook a lot".
Elva - "He saw some Facebook, Myspace. And he said somebody was looking at gay porn".
I EEEEEE-MEDIATELY knew what she was talking about and all I could say was...
"IT WAS ME! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA".
That had to be one of the most embarassing, but funny times in my life.
CHRIS RADTKE: I just watched the Season Three Finale and I have to say: nice glasses, Otto.
KURT SUTTER: Oh, thanks man.
RADTKE: Did you always see Agent Stahl going out like that?
KURT: When we introduced her character in Season One, she was obviously a different animal than the current character, but Ally Walker brought this great sort of quirky madness to Stahl. You know Ally just has this crazy gleam in her eye.
RADTKE: She has that wild eye.
KURT: It really was. She really helped me shape that character and making her a little more of a predator. She was probably more of a sexual predator than any of our guys were. You know she had that crazy energy. We pushed the envelope, I've always sort of pushed toward getting to the most absurd choices organically as we can, and I think the choices she made with that character really gave me the freedom to go down that road. I think once the scene happened with Otto in the prison, I think that was really the turning point for Stahl in terms of crossing the line, in that it's no longer a necessarily objective opinion, it became personal for her.
You know obviously this season Jax plays her like a fiddle in terms of knowing where her weaknesses are and you know that Alpha Cop Paradox which is you become so obsessed with getting the bad guy that you ultimately have to become more evil than the evil you are pursuing. They played with that all the time on The Shield. I really think that was the case for Stahl this year. Seeing her need to use the Sons to get to the bigger goal of the IRA and this whole international gun running thing that would make her a superstar and that she's ultimately a woman that is driven and probably not unlike Tig, I think she's sociopathic and has no intimacy. I think all her relationships including the one with Agent Tyler weren't about intimacy, they were all as a means to an end.
I wasn't quite sure how the whole scapegoat thing would play out but ultimately as we started creating this character of Tyler and she became a greater threat to what Stahl wanted to do, it served Stahl's character best if she killed two birds with one stone, literally. We were able to push boundaries with that and to me I always knew there would be that reaction that happens in the finale when Jax figures out exactly what she's done. Jax has that moment where he literally takes a step back from her because he realizes that she's nuts. That ultimately she's far more evil or Machiavellian than he or Clay or the Club is. We knew we were going to cater down that road, and there's not a lot of places you can go after that.
RADTKE: She's one of the best TV villains I've seen in years. What do you do without her?
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Plus, the Titans were gettin whooped in the game. Why did he instigate another beat down???
Hats off to Andre Johnson though. He was ready to take the punishment like a man. He was in the wrong, and knew it.
$25,000 to Andre Johnson is like $10 to me, on a week that I get paid.
- Steve Jobs
Friday, November 26, 2010
I have learned that it's not just my parents that say random stuff, but all of them do. But I love them all!
As I was on a FaceTime call with Cookie from Atlanta...
Uncle Jr. - Cookie! How you get in the phone? How you do dat Lil Rick??? Thats crazzzzy! Can you see me? How can I be in the phone???
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Anyways, I saw their little performance on the AMA's Sunday. Yes I was singing along, but they were missing one thing.
I could get 8 guys (To make a total of 9, because Kevin quit the Backstreet Boys to get away from the royal embarassment of this tour) and sing 10 times better than those old farts.
If they REALLY wanted to make some true cash, add N'Sync on the tour.
Wait, I take that back. N'Sync should do their own tour. And the opening acts should be 3LW and All 4 One. That would be ultra legit.
- Pac Sun
1. God - Because he is still letting me live a great healthy life on His green Earth.
2. Lindsay a.k.a. Spiritz a.k.a. Little Bear a.k.a. FBM - You are just awesome. And you feed me. And you put up with my late night/early morning boy band singing. I love you.
3. My parents/family - You have made me who I am. A crazy person. But I love you for it. So thank you!
4. FTB - Yes, I still refer to you as the FTB. Yall are my boys fo life. I still think about the days back in high school when we used to wear matching Neon Moon shirts. Thats how we roll.
5. Common Sense - Im so thankful that I have a little bit of this. It is always needed and im so thankful to have some. This morning I was having a dream about eating today, and I slobbered all over my pillow. I mean it was pretty bad. But thanks to common sense, I flipped my pillow over. That's what Im talkin about.
6. Kanye West - Thank you for putting out one of the most amazing albums I have ever heard. I have listened to it in its entirety more than 7 times, and it gets better and better each time. You are a musical genius. Forget what everybody else says.
7. Happy 18th Birthday Miley Cyrus.
8. AT&T U-Verse - Thanks for the free HBO, Cinemax, Showtime, Starz and Encore this week. We are recording tons of movies this week. (I still need to look through the guide and see if there are some more movies though because Lin is recording a lot of girly stuff.)
9. Thanks Richard Seymour for punching Ben Roethlisberger.
10. Thanks for the Cowboys for showing a little life even though you are 3-7. We still have faith. Well, I do.